introvert or extrovert??

hari ni,g "makan pulut"

i dun really understand why did they use that phrase

i only see rice there..o well..

when i said "diri" dan "bayang"

i dont know which one is the real me..

i dont like it to be surround by others

i really dont like it 

but i seems greeting everyone that i know

shana's friends,once told her that i look like living in me own world..

i guess..

er,with my headphone and dressing,who dont think that (^o^)

as my roomate in my 1st year,chah once told me that

she was very afraid of me at 1st as there seems like something surround me that she cant approach me

but when i help her during our mount-climbing,

she grew attach to me

she's a nice girl,spoil i would say

as she's an only child..

well,maybe im a nice girl inside,it just me not notice because 

of this so much barrier i put for myself

well,what can i say bout myself,at least i know manners =)

er,what i was bout to say bout "makan pulut" td is..

i dont really have appetite nowadays..

since november i gues..

why oh why?? me dunno XD

i only eat as tak nak pengsan

and i have gastric +_+

i only eat some..more like food tasting if u ask me..LOL

and as im at home right know,few people are going to know me door and windows if me not eating..

i have a warm family actually..

maybe it just me who didnt notice it.. T_T

and i dont really know them at the feast

i think i know people better at kelantan compare to here

it seems like everyday, i see new person

its been more than 7 years im here

well,as im not that type of person who go visiting or wandering 

guess that do make sense

and as refer to live in me own world,

how can i know anyone else?? XD

i start mixing with people in form 4 if my diary is right

something happen but i dont want to talk bout it yet..

late form 4..

i can still remember my question to that sis

"sis,im scared..sekarang saya macam dah berubah..

tiba2 jadi sangat peramah dan happy.."

and she told me,everyone will change at a time in her or his life

she touch my hand and smile to me warmly

that was a nice feeling actually,i feel reborn

i do have friend in school..

lots of them

but its not me who's making friend,

they said i seems like a nice person and wanna be friend with me

actually..i have a thing toward some of the boys in my old school

and i kind of fight with them openly

maybe thats what make me popular among those girls XD

well,let just say,most of them are like

"perempuan melayu terakhir" with all the feminine and girly 

and only few of them are bit boyish like me..kuan3

o ya,btw..this one girl

kyra michi

she's kind of "not girly"

she doesnt like being girly at all

but if you ask me,she's among da best candidate for "anugerah wanita terbaik" XD

her cook is very...great

she knows how to handle kids n...er,boys..gomen neh michi-san =P

she knows her way with elders and people

what else do you want?? my dear michi XD

she's nice with me too..

i cry to her once when i was having a..er,fight with me mum

i went to school,toss me bag and ran to her

i hug her and cry..she sooth me and ask me what happen

she's a nice girl,really..

i like her as much as i like jie..

they both have the same trait..

being nice with me XD

of cause we only act spoil in front of the person we like =)

my final year project (fyp aka pita) really got me

making me shadow growing stronger inside me

i curse a lot

not that very bad cursing but curse is still a curse..

and with me condition right now,

i cant help it..

what more can i do??

listening to the sacred verse..

reading the sacred verse

to help me regain myself..

im too weak now..

and that fyp,me gonna defeat it

u just wait till sunday..i dare u fyp!!

im getting crazier and crazier..haih @_@

dear lord,please help me..only to you i pray..